Welcome Eleanor Rose - A Birth Story

Warning: This is my birth story - if you don't want to read about the exciting, painful, messy process of giving birth, then skip this one. It might have a few too many gory details for you!

Everyone always says that you'll know your in labor when it begins. Well mine started out more as a question mark than anything else. On Tuesday, July 5th at 3:30pm I was laying on the couch watching TV when I felt cramp-like tightenings in my abdomen. It wasn't anything dramatic, just noticeable. I know that many women have stronger Braxton-Hicks and false contractions near the end of their labor so I didn't want to get too excited yet. I decided to keep my plans and go to my yoga class in Edinburgh. I drove the half an hour into town, breathing through 3 tightenings in 30 minutes. They were distracting, but manageable. By the time I arrived in class, I was sweating, walking on my tip toes, and needing to stop and sway and breathe through each tightening about ever 5 minutes. I didn't do much in class, but it a wonderful way to begin the early stages of labor. I decided it wouldn't be safe for me to drive home so I had Paul take a cab out to meet me. 

As labor can take so long, we decided to go to Costco to pick up some last minute groceries. I used the cart to breathe through the tightenings and other than walking slowly, I wasn't being impeded much. I know that being upright and moving is good for labor so I wasn't worried about being out and about. 

We got home and I let my parents know I thought I was in early labor, but not to worry I knew it could take a very long time.

We started timing the contractions just to get a gauge on what was happening. They were coming every 3 and a half minutes and lasting about 45 seconds, so we called the midwife while I tried to scarf down some food. I knew once it got going it might be hard to really eat! The midwife told me to call back when my contractions were 3 minutes apart, lasting for a minute each and that pattern continued for 3 hours. I told her that I planned on a warm bath, my TENS machine and maybe a funny movie and to stay at home as long as possible. She agreed this was the best choice, and I went about my business. The bath was soothing as I began using my hypnobirthing CD and positive affirmations. I got out and Paul helped me with my TENS machine and I tried (and failed!) to work through the contractions laying down to rest. Instead I needed to be standing, rocking, squatting, and moving. I tried my birth ball (I hated it!) but preferred laying with my head on the bed and standing. I watched Pitch Perfect, zoning out every 3 minutes or so to breathe - count of 4 in, count of 4 out. Working with my body. Picturing opening, embracing and working through each one. I encouraged Paul to get some rest - who knew how long this would take? 

By 2:15 I had been having regular contractions every 3 minutes lasting for a minute (or sometimes more) so I tip-toed downstairs and called the midwife. Although I agreed that I could probably stay home longer, I was struggling to work through the contractions while sitting and we had a 15/20 minute drive to the hospital. If we waiting too long, we could end up in morning traffic and the sitting while contracting would have been very stressful. They agreed I should come in, so I woke Paul up and we packed up the car and headed out.

On the way to the hospital, we saw a fire by the side of the road! We decided to pull over and check it out, as it is near a very large, dry field. It was an electrical fire, and it was spreading, so Paul called the fire brigade, notified them about it, and then we continued on our way.

We arrived at the Edinburgh Royal Birth Centre about 3:15, and they took me to my birthing suite. It was a large, lovely room with a big pool and lots of other useful things such as bean bags and birth balls and mats and an ensuite bathroom. They gave me my first exam and I was already 5cm dilated, but my waters hadn't broken and the sac was bulging through my cervix. I was so pleased with myself, and asked to get in the bath. We put on my hypnobirthing tracks and I urged Paul to get more sleep so he could be awake and energetic for the end. I felt calm and floating through the contractions, as they got stronger, but further apart. I started to worry that the bath was slowing down my labor, and the midwife said my temperature and pulse were too high (because of the hot bath). I got out to labor standing up, using the same posture as before of leaning over the bed. They let me labor on my own and work through the contractions with my hypnobirthing for another 7 hours before the next check at 10:15. The contractions had gotten closer together again and increased in intensity. This check showed I was only dilated to 7cm and they suspected because the baby's head was not putting the needed pressure on my cervix to help it dilate. I agreed to having my waters broken which they did quickly and painlessly. 

They allowed me to labor for another 7 hours without disruption, only now I had a midwife and student midwife in the room near constantly monitoring me. I was still using breathing and hypnobirthing, but the pain was increasing and the contractions were much longer so I asked to try the gas and air. This helped take the edge of and reminded me to breathe, but also made me violently sick and I was throwing up after every contractions. The contractions then increased sharply in intensity and began doubling, one after another without rest. I pushed on, having moments of doubt and feeling like I needed to know how much longer. I needed an end-point, just like all of my races. I couldn't see the finish line so I didn't know if I could make it. I remember looking at Paul and saying, "I can't do this!" and the midwives and Paul saying, "You ARE doing it!" The sensations, the pain, was exponentially more than anything I had experienced but I still knew that each one brought me closer to meeting my baby. I tried to remind myself that they could not be stronger than me - this was MY body making the contractions, they WERE me, they weren't stronger than me. Several times I felt like I would explode with the pain, that there was no way I could make it through the end of that contractions. All you mamas out there know what I'm talking about!

About 5:00 they checked me again - I was still at 7cm with no progress. The midwife said that we needed to put me on a drip to move on labor and that I'd have to be transferred to the labor ward. I turned to Paul that moment and told him I needed an epidural - I had made it this far and I was so disappointed, but I knew the drip would make what was already nearly unbearable even more so. They whisked me into a wheelchair, gathered my things and brought me upstairs. An anesthesiologists came in to give me the epidural and asked me to stay completely still through the contractions. They monitored me and the baby for about 30 minutes, when a midwife came back to tell me that the baby was in distress and had an erratic heartbeat. After several consultations they decided that the baby would not cope with continued labor and that I would need an emergency c-section. Although it is not what I wanted, a safe, healthy baby was most important to me. We agreed, signed the papers, and I was told I'd have a baby within 30 minutes. They topped up my epidural with stronger meds for the surgery, took Paul to change into scrubs and whisked me away. 

I'm on a lot of drugs here, as we wait for the moment we become parents. 

I was rolled onto an operating table as the piles of people poured in for the surgery. They started draping me with a cloth when a surgeon poked her head around the cloth and said, "Hello Elizabeth, do you recognize me?" I said no, sorry, and then she introduced herself as one of my student's parents. I immediately realized who she was, and she asked if it was okay to operate on me. I thought it was nice to have someone who personally cared about my progress to be in charge of my surgery. Before they started everyone in the room checked in and said who they are and why they were there. They stated the reason for the surgery, and then began. Paul was next to me, but facing away from my tummy. At 6:15, they pulled the baby out and let Paul see - It was a girl! I couldn't believe it! They cut her cord and took her to a separate table for a check. Within minutes she was on my chest and I was trying to hold her, even though my arms were numb. Paul and I were both crying, we had our precious, perfect little girl. They sewed me up and cleaned up and put Eleanor into a cot and wheeled us out. They gave me the chance to breastfeed and she latched perfectly the first time! 

Meeting Eleanor for the first time.

Our first family picture!

The doctors came out to talk to me about the delivery and how everything went. Overall, there were no complications and everything had gone to plan. Apparently Eleanor had slipped back-to-back and was trying to come out with the side/back of her head. The surgeon said it was a good call to take her out via c-section; she was not going to make it out in her position, and the stress of the labor was too much for her to cope with. I was in labor for 27 hours total and had a perfect, amazing, beautiful little girl to show for it. Eleanor Rose was 8 pounds, 14 ounces and 24 inches long. Her full head of hear and bright eyes make her look just like her daddy. 

 

The next few nights in hospital passed in a blur of feeding, checks, visits, and cuddles. I didn't want to put her down I just wanted to hold her close to me like she had been in my tummy. After two nights in hospital I asked to be released early so I could be home with my family. Eleanor passed all her tests and so did I, so they sent me home. Phew! It was all worth it for my perfect little bundle who continues to amaze me every day. 

 

 

 

Coming home for the first time!

Countdown to Wriggles

With the nursery finished, the freezer meals made, the house cleaned top to bottom, the baby gear bought, the car seat installed, the hospital bag packed, the parents in town, and me on maternity leave, now all we need is for Wriggles to make an arrival. I'm one day past my due date now and starting to get just the tinsiest bit impatient. Even knowing that most first babies come late, one can always hope for an almost-on-time arrival, right? I know all you mamas out there will tell me to put my feet up and enjoy the quiet moments while I can because everything is about to change. Well I AM enjoying the quiet moments. And drinking hot tea. And napping in the afternoon. And taking long, hot showers. And stealing snuggles from Paul. And going to movies, and eating out, and having date nights... everything you should do before a baby comes that you might not get the chance to do for quite a while. The thing is, Paul and I had 6 lovely years of marriage to enjoy all that us time, and I've had a good 30 years of me time and now I'm ready for our little one to join us. It can be hard not to be impatient when you've been waiting for something for so long!

I am grateful, at least, that I'm still quite comfortable and mobile at the end of the pregnancy. Other than rolling over in bed (which is painful/uncomfortable) and fitting behind the steering wheel, I still haven't encountered any real problems. If Wriggles needs two more weeks to finish baking, then so be it.

Hah, I say that now, but how will I feel in another week?

I have only just started dipping my toes into all the "it might induce labor" myths - long walks, curry, pineapple, bouncing on my birth ball etc. Without work to keep me busy and with all the nesting already done, I'm struggling to fill my time up. I don't want to do anything too exhausting, but I'm supposed to keep active and upright to encourage Wriggles into a good position. What did all you mamas do out there when waiting for your baby to arrive? I know that in less than two weeks Wriggles will be here (they don't let you go THAT overdue!) but those two weeks kind of feels like an eternity! 

A girl in my pregnant-yoga class made a very good observation yesterday. It's like you've been training for an ultra-marathon for the past 9 months and you know it's almost time to start. But it could be at any moment in the next few hours/days/weeks and you don't know when! So you have to enjoy your time, but also rest. Eat enough food in case it starts during the night, but not too much. Always be on the lookout and ready for signs, but not be anxious. Because at any moment someone could shout, "Go!" and the race has started!

Thoughts on Pregnancy and Baby Growing

It's been a while since I've written anything, but not much has happened over here. Except, you know, growing a small person. I can't believe I am nearly 36 weeks pregnant - only one more week until I'm considered "full term"! I fully expect to have this baby 2 weeks late, so I'm mentally preparing for another 6 weeks of being pregnant and hoping for a pleasant surprise when the little one comes near my due date (or not, babies do whatever they please!). 

I have enjoyed this pregnancy more than I could have ever imagined. All you hear from anyone is how terrible is it to be pregnant. And for some, this is very true. Those poor mamas who suffer through never ending nausea, joint pain, sciatica, high blood pressure, debilitating back pain ... the list can go on and on and on. I have been extremely lucky and had very few problems. Yes, I feel rather large and yes, I knock my poor baby bump into walls, doors and the back of children's heads (sorry students!), but on the whole I feel great.

Maybe it has something to do with it taking longer than expected to become pregnant, the intervention required or how much I have longed to become a mother for as long as I could remember. Or maybe it's just good biology (thanks mom!) which has made this pregnancy easy. Whatever the reason, I love it. Feeling little Wriggles kicking and elbowing and jabbing, hiccuping and flailing is a highlight of every day. Yes, even when s/he finds my ribs. It looks like an alien is attacking!

I love knowing my baby is there with me all the time and s/he is safe and warm and happy. I look down at my tummy every day and wonder who this little person is. A boy or a girl? Sporty? Creative? Serious? Dark hair? Blond hair? None of it much matters, I'm just excited to meet them and get to know them!

Playing a game with Paul while Wriggles kicks me!

It's not all sunshine and roses of course. Some days I feel particularly exhausted, and with three weeks left of work and the end of term looming nearer I can feel myself ready to start maternity leave. I feel so lucky to live in a country that allows the opportunity to take time off work before the baby comes which I know is not true for everyone. The work days are long but pass quickly and I know I'd be bored as ever if I stayed at home. Unfortunately, teaching is not exactly a relaxing job, especially because I spend the majority of each day standing, bending over desks, picking things off the ground, etc. I think it's actually healthy to stay active, but I wouldn't say no to a nap in the afternoons if I had the chance (which you don't, when you teach!). The mornings are especially brutal with a 6am wake up that never allows me quite enough sleep. Everyone keeps telling me to sleep now while I can. The only time I get the chance to sleep in is the weekends, and even then my internal body clock gets me up around 7. Still, I'm not complaining. I look forward to seeing my colleagues and students and I enjoy teaching. I just keep ticking down the days - only 14 more wake-ups! 

I have found a few things especially useful throughout the second half of my pregnancy. First, I take prenatal yoga classes with other pregnant mamas. I love this because we take time to talk about how we're feeling each week and address any aches or pains. Mothers who have had their babies come back to share their birth stories which help us consider questions we might otherwise not have known about. I also have mostly kept up with going to gymnastics. I can't do much at this point other than stretching, handstands, cartwheels and strength training. I love still doing something I did pre-baby growing and it's always nice to visit with my friends! Handstanding pregnant - 27 weeks, 32 weeks, and 35 weeks respectively. If you do it throughout your pregnancy, it's not as difficult as it looks.

The one thing I've really been trying to do (and this is so hard for me!) is to allow myself to be lazy and to let things go and rest when I need it. I like to have things done RIGHT NOW, and will come home from a long day of work to a messy kitchen and feel like I need to clean it, cook dinner, and then clean it again. I've let myself be lazy and ignore the kitchen and eat leftovers. I get myself to bed at a (sort of) decent hour and leave grading assignments for the next day. I ask Paul to help me do house things more than ever instead of just struggling through. It's hard for me to do but it's important to start asking for help before the baby comes and I'll need help more than ever. Like, for example, getting rid of all these boxes and things in our playroom, Paul did most of the heavy lifting and work! This room is now thankfully box free and clean and baby ready :)

Before...

After

New pictures are on the walls!

I've also been so lucky to have wonderful and kind colleagues who have thrown me a little baby shower! I got to wear a special "Mummy to Be" sash, eat delicious food, have lovely chats and receive gorgeous gifts. I felt so special!

 

 

So that about sums up all my random thoughts. With all our baby gear in the house and the nursery basically set up it's not just a waiting game. I know that life is going to change forever in a wonderful way and I'm savoring every last moment. Next update I might have a baby with me!

Babymoon in Mallorca

Everyone says a baby brings the greatest challenges to a relationship, no matter how strong it is. I think this is the idea behind a babymoon; a couple gets one more chance to build bonds before the little one arrives. I'm already quite an enthusiastic traveller, so it came as no surprise to my poor husband when I started bringing up the idea of a babymoon and researching places to go. The goal of this trip, however, was very different from most of my travels. Usually I plan jam-packed days with constant movement, trying to get the most out of my time in a new place by seeing and doing everything possible. This time I was looking for nothing more than rest and relaxation, and time to spend a whole week with nothing to do except enjoy Paul's company, eat good food, and relax. After lots of searching, I decided Mallorca was the place for us - not too far, somewhere new, decent weather and decent prices. After even more research, I settled on a nearly all inclusive - breakfast and dinner, flights, transfers and hotels all paid for in advance. I was not looking to have to plan or negotiate or discover anything, I wanted an easy trip.

Now on our last day of holiday, I think that this has been one of the best decisions during my pregnancy. My job, which I absolutely love, keeps me quite busy during the day and means I am generally away from home for eleven or so hours every day. Add to that the attempts to keep fit (yoga, spin, gymnastics, strength training) and my second job of teaching online and most days I'm too tired to spend quality time with Paul or thinking about my baby. Even the weekends are not restful, as our list of things to do to the house before Wriggles arrives grows every week. The solution was this babymoon, a week of uninterrupted me time, couple time, and mommy and baby time.

What have we done on this holiday? Honestly, not much. Most days when the weather was fair we would go for a walk to the end of the promenade and back, stopping for lunch and drinks and sunshine along the way. We chose panoramic cafes overlooking the sea and sand, listening to the rhythmic crashing of the waves on the sand and rocks. We had long periods of laying on the top deck of our hotel soaking in the sun and reading, and long game sessions of all our favorites that we brought along (Dominion, Dead of Winter, Splendor, Castles, Fluxx, Hive, Lords of Scotland, Catan, and more!). Sprinkled in there were naps, chats, more reading, movie binges, massages, pictures and snuggles. These are all things I know we will have much less time for once our little Wriggles arrives, so it feels good to get our fill of them. 

 

Wriggles' first time on the beach and in the Mediterranean

  

Wriggles can sense light now, so I took my belly out for some sunshine

 

I ordered this frozen yogurt with 4 toppings - but I didn't want so much yogurt! Ah!

 

I nearly finished it all in the end :)

 

Games, relaxing, walks and drinks!

 

I found lots of pregnancy friendly non-alcoholic drinks!

 

One of our favourite games, Dead of Winter, was great during rainy spells

 

So many walks along the promenade! 

 

 

Lounging on our top deck, it feels like we're on a cruise ship!

The best part of this holiday has just been the ability to BE together, without exhaustion and stress and preoccupations. To share Wriggles kicks every time they happen, to talk about anything and everything that pops into our minds and to take lots of quiet adult time of reading and walking and playing games. We know everything is about to change, so it's great to have one last little adult hurrah, while also enjoying having our little one with us to share this special time. Who knows, maybe we'll bring him/her back with us when they're older to share this special place with them.

Getting Ready for Wriggles

I admit I've put off writing on here for several weeks now even though I've definitely been thinking about it. It's not that I don't have anything to say, but more that I don't want this blog to turn into an all consuming pregnancy-baby-toddler blog. But I suppose it is a blog about my life, and I the biggest thing in my life is my little growing baby. Sure, other things are happening - I'm working, trying out a new (prenatal) yoga class, organizing the house (and nursery!) and visiting friends as well as having visitors at our house. But do you really want to hear me whine about how tired I am from all the work? Or a play by play of my yoga class?

Wriggles (what we've named our baby for now) is 25 weeks now, which means I'm only 15 weeks from my due date (AHHH!!!). It seemed like the beginning of this pregnancy was moving so sloooowly as I waited to finish my first trimester - the riskiest part - and move into the safer and certainly more comfortable second trimester. Now things are just rushing by, and I only have a few weeks left until I'm in the last third of my pregnancy. So far, things have been going great. I've managed to avoid most of the second trimester problems, and I love all the sweet kicks and movements I'm feeling every day. I crave fresh fruit and veggies, and both scans have showed an active baby without any problems, measuring right on schedule. 

One thing I find very strange is that I forget that I'm pregnant nearly all the time. I wonder to myself, does this happen to everyone who is pregnant? I look down at my round tummy and for a second I ask myself, "What the heck did I eat?!" and then I remember I'm just pregnant and that isn't a 3 pound burrito in there. My husband also manages to forget that I'm pregnant quite often, until my tummy appears, then he is quickly reminded with a tiny panic attack. Has this happened to other ladies out there?

23 weeks!

I'm also trying to be more kind and forgiving to myself. Feeling extremely tired? It's okay to skip my workout and go to bed early. NEED some ice cream? I'll have a few spoonfuls and help the baby with the calcium intake for the day. I'm trying to get home early from work, and ask for more help than ever before from Paul. He's been great about making me dinner when I feel like I just don't have the energy to get off the couch (or the energy to do anything, really). It's hard to do, but also, growing a person is hard.

We've really started preparing for Wriggles' arrival now, with the whole inside of the house repainted with durable paint, the nursery being put together piece by piece (with all the lovely presents from my baby shower!) and our near weekly discussions about names. Because we are not finding out the gender of our baby, we've got to pick both types of names and all of our baby gear is gender neutral. We've even started a baby guessing pool, where the closest guess will win a prize from us! If you'd like to make a guess, click HERE and you can put it in as a guest (no sign in needed). If you're reading this, I'd love for you to make a guess!

 

 

 

That's about all for now, we've got a few busy weeks coming up with more visitors, a babymoon, spring break, and of course, Wriggles' arrival in June! Things are only getting more exciting!